101 things about me

Wednesday, 18 February 2009

Getting accustomed to being on my own again...

I am house sitting. A good friend has gone traveling for 10 weeks and was happy to oblige when I offered to house sit in her absence. What a beautiful gift she has given me. Her home is a retreat in the city and I love it.

We met during my arts course last year and she has become a wonderful friend. Her home is much like her... beautiful, artistic, peaceful, welcoming and warmly embracing. It has large windows which welcome lots of light. The top level has a great vista overlooking the rooftops and allows for uninterrupted views of the hot air balloons that can be seen most mornings floating across the city. Downstairs there is a paved courtyard that is bordered by elevated garden beds and is shaded by a big leafy tree.

Tonight is a warm Melbourne evening and the breeze is whispering in the leaves outside. I ate in the courtyard which was lovely and which I will try to do so as much as I can while I am here. My own flat only has a communal garden and so this is an absolute treat.

It is night four on my own and I am feeling far more relaxed now. The first couple of nights I felt slightly unsettled at being on my own again and getting accustomed to being in a new space.

In early January, I was craving total escape. Considered throwing in my job, renting my flat and escaping up the coast to a small seaside town where I could hide from the world. Knowing I wasn't in any state to make any major decisions, I decided to postpone anything too serious for the next 6 months. And so, this next 10 weeks has become my salvation. It will allow me time to think. Time to breathe. Time.

Being alone again is a strange sensation. Mal and I broke up in September last year, and whilst we are no longer together, we are still good friends and he is still living in my flat. He has been especially amazing over the last six months or more... listened to my greatest fears and comforted me in moments of despair and tears (of which there have been many). He has been there to pick up the pieces and saved my sanity on a number of occasions. And for that I will be forever grateful.

BUT (and he knows this is the way of my world) I do like my own space. I like my own company and I have lots to keep me occupied. My house sitting stint comes at just the right time. And so, for the next ten weeks, I am on my own. And loving it.

8 comments:

cloud9 said...

This sounds like heaven to me! Most days, evenings, weekends, you name it; I am surrounded by people! They are people I love but I secretly love my own company just as much. Our environment is important to our wellbeing and this sounds like a very much needed tonic. Enjoy! xx

Kate James said...

It's lovely to hear from you again Jacinta and to know that you have a place that will be your retreat for now. I can relate to that yearning for space and alone time. Sometimes you're more lonely with other people than you are on your own. I hope the small treasures of that beautiful space provide you with some nurturing. xx

L said...

Ah, that does sound like great timing! And quite a nice place, too. Enjoy it! :)

Thanks for your comments, by the way.

Renee said...

Sounds so fantastic. I am so like that too, the me time.

I love people but I have to be alone. I need my own space.

You are a darling Cinta and a brave and wonderful friend.

Love Renee

MW Knitgirl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MW Knitgirl said...

I received your amazing letter, and I have to say it was such perfect timing as you'll see when you receive the one I just mailed to you today but there may be another on its heals - so much inside to be said. I'm so grateful we've become friends, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reaching out to me.

Enjoy the peaceful place where you are - I truly envy you as there just isn't a place in my state to retreat to (not in the winter, anyway, it's freezing outside!). So my home office will have to do for now instead. Along with a cup of hot chocolate and a shortbread cookie. Yeah..that sounds perfect right now. :-)

Be good to yourself, okay?

Much love and big hugs,
P.

kate said...

Oh this sounds lovely! i agree with you about having space to yourself. I think its very important to take the time out on your own, especially at a bit of a difficult time, to get back in touch with yourself.
I'm glad to hear you've found a way to have some space to yourself at this time :) enjoy!

flossy-p said...

Urgh, you've had such a hard time recently. I'm glad you're able to escape, to somewhere neautral to recharge a bit :)