101 things about me

Sunday 27 January 2008

This is what I am scared of...

"This is..." is a new idea from Angela at Three Buttons. Each week there will be a new theme (nominated earlier in the week by a fellow blogger) and published on a Sunday. This Sunday is "This is... what scares me"

I have cheated a little, because I am about to tell you that I have now been cured of my biggest fear. Like many others I was once terrified of spiders. I am happy to say, I am now cured. Yes, it's true. There is hope for all arachnophobes. This was first posted in May 2007 and this is my story... read on, don't be scared...

Did Someone Say Spider?
As anyone who knows me (and anyone within earshot of my flat) would know - I have been terrified of spiders forever (well, for as long as I can remember anyway).

If there was ever a spider anywhere in the house as I grew up, it had to be removed before I went to bed. I became hysterical when a huntsman ran across my lap in the back of a friend's car. My response resulted in a screeching of brakes and an equally hysterical group of teenaged girls throwing themselves from the car as it was still drawing to a stop.

I will always remember the story of a childhood friend whose brother had strapped on his motorcycle helmet, only to feel the leg of a huntsman spider stretch down onto his forehead. The vision of one arachnophobic biker trying to unbuckle his helmet as 3 screaming women ran around him incapable of assisting, has left a lasting impression.

In my twenties, as I planned 4 months of travel in Africa, friends and family asked how I would cope with the spiders. I told them I would just have to deal with it. And so, on the night when hundreds of spiders ran across the ground as darkness fell across the Serengeti, I retreated to the truck. On the night I was meant to sleep in a grass roofed hut in Zaire, and half a dozen spiders and a few scorpions scuttled across the floor within minutes of the lights being dimmed, I slept outside. No safer in reality, but at least there was more space to run away if I had to!

Just last year, when I came across a huntsman in my kitchen one morning at 6am, and I had to get a neighbour to come and remove it with a vacuum cleaner, I finally admitted to myself it was more than a little ridiculous and something had to be done. It was time to meet the phobia head-on and deal with it.

Through some searching of the internet, I found Taronga Zoo in Sydney has a 'Fearless at Taronga' program. It is four and a half hours of education, talk, laughter, reality, hypnosis, relaxation techniques, NLP and confrontation. The team of Tooronga experts were given the responsibility of freeing a group of 12 arachnophobes of their terror of all things eight legged. With each one of us, they had a lifetime of fear to conquer. Without doubt, it was a big ask.

There were promises of handling huntsman spiders and even the possibility of holding a Chilean Rose spider (tarantula). When I enrolled in the course, I decided holding the Chilean Rose spider would be my main focus on the day and a measure of my success. There were no guarantees, but with a previous 100% success rate of ridding all participants of their fear, it had to be worth the trip to Sydney. It had to be done.

I arrived at Taronga with high expectations and I am happy to say I was not disappointed. This has got to be one of THE most amazing thing I have EVER done. For a life that has so far included seeing gorillas in the jungles of Rwanda, white water rafting in the USA and more recently a year that has included swimming with dolphins and jumping from a plane at 10,000+ feet, that's saying something!


I had a GREAT day. It was all I had hoped for and more. I could not believe the change across just 4 1/2 hours! As I said earlier, I had been terrified of spiders for as long as I can remember and to be totally freed from the paralysis of fear is incredible. I did all I had hoped. I held the Chilean Rose spider, a real tarantula, in my bare hands. I then caught huntsman spiders and held a couple, letting them run across my hands. Can you believe it? I can barely believe it myself. I now feel more than comfortable with a face to face encounter with a huntsman spider anytime in the future.

If you have shuddered as you read this post, felt a lurch in your stomach, the prickle of cold sweat has appeared on you forehead or you have even felt like vomiting at the thought of touching a spider, this program is for you. IF you are as terrified of spiders as I was, and you have managed to read this far, REALLY REALLY consider taking part in their next course. You would not be disappointed. All the team were fantastic, in particular Warrick (the zoo's spider expert and handler) and Sarah-Jane (hypnotist). The rest of the support team were really supportive too - and their enthusiasm was genuinely contagious.

I can honestly count it as a life changing experience. Really. This is no exaggeration. I actually held a Chilean Rose spider. A real, hairy, hand filling, live tarantula, in my own bare hands. Oh my God. It was amazing. It was the experience of a lifetime. If I can do that - I reckon I can do just about anything.

15 comments:

Lark said...

You are one brave woman!

Dees said...

Wow that is awsome!you go girl!xoxo

Betty Jo said...

BRAVO! I am so phobic the thought of your whole experience is terrifying.
I hope the photo of you is as amazing as it sounds, because I couldn't look at it...and I can't read the word starting with T with out goose bumps. You must have great determination and loads of guts!

CurlyPops said...

That is an absolutely amazing story. I don't know whether I would be as brave to confront my fear!

Jenny said...

Good on you!!! Spiders do get a raw deal as they are such fascinating creatures but so feared by many. I am truly impressed by what you did!

Anonymous said...

Congrats for conquering your fears. I saw a documentary on ABC regarding this very course you attended at Toronga Zoo, it was fascinating..it's a great fear to conquer after flying...

Jodie said...

Oh MY God, there you are holding it..and it's hairy...

Hyena In Petticoats said...

Now hat's a story and a half!

Good on you for conquering your fear!

Leah xxx

Hyena In Petticoats said...

^^ that's - not hat's!!!^^^^^

Sharon said...

You're so brave!I've just read this from behind my fingers and now I feel sick! and I couldn't look at the picture either!

Malcolm Garth said...

That's my girl!

Anastasia said...

oh wow! what an awesome story...bravo to you and what better way to challenge your fear!!
had to laugh at sucking that spider up with a vacuum cleaner - i'll have to remember that next time I see one!

Sunshine said...

Thank you .. and thanks for stopping by our blog.
What a great "Afraid" story! Appreciated reading it.

Anonymous said...

Holy. Crap.

That is just TERRIFYING.

I have a thing with spiders. :(

Juddie said...

You go girl!

Since childhood I've had a fear of big hairy spiders crawling on me, but I've recently made friends with some little (non-hairy) jumping money-spiders who live in in my house. The next step is be comfortable with gently evicting any huntsmen that turn up uninvited ....

I like the idea of training at the zoo.