I start my course tomorrow... the one I applied for in the first week of November... the course which now seems like it's never going to happen even though tomorrow it begins. It's an arts course which includes painting and drawing, art theory, visiting artists in their studios and hopefully some classes in print making and sculpture.
I will be at school 2 full days a week. Thursday and Friday. I am going part time at work which I consider will be a move in the right direction, though financially it will take a bit of adjustment. New challenges are just around the corner. I am stepping outside the comfort zone once again, which always fills me with a combination of nerves and excitement.
And so, as the day draws nearer and the excitement grows, so too does the doubt. It's the nerves talking, I know it's crazy, but I can't help it. What if I am hopeless? What if I have no talent? What if no-one likes me? What if I don't even like the course? So many doubts swimming round in my head.
I admit only two aloud to Mal.
What if I am no good?
You'll be fine... comes the reply.
"Or worse than that, what if I am the worst in the whole group?"
And the reply? ... "Then you'll be most improved."
That was a pretty cool response. It was a positive angle I hadn't considered.
And there you go, he said just the right thing at just the right time. Put it all in perspective somehow. And I am still nervous and I still have (a few) doubts, but it will all be fine. Of course I know everything will be OK, but it's nice to hear it from some-one else sometimes.
Now... where's my pencil case?
4 comments:
There will be others there feeling just the same or worse. Please let us know how it goes. I'm excited for you.
Have fun with it-- I'm sure it'll be great!
So... Now that the first day is over... How was it???
F A N T A S T I C. No less.
It's going to be great!
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